I went to the daycentre and got some toast and tea, then I went on to the mission, my adoptive grandad was at the mission and he  gave me a big hug, the blind man with his guide dog was there, we always end up talking about guide dogs, and though I know a bit about guide dogs, I don't know everything, I think I will look it up later.
I have a few cups of tea at the mission, and they pray for me, they get a bit intense with the praying. Grandad gives me another big hug, and I set off with my ration of bananas and sweets, they have given me a kind of sweet called a 'fruit winder' I don't quite understand the point of these things, you have to unwind them in order to eat them.

The mission said I can use them as a c/o address, that is very handy.

The environment in the library is hot and noisy, there is a librarian hanging over the computer where I am trying to work and it is impossible to get anything done.
I cannot cope with men standing over me, it makes me go to pieces, and this guy is supposed to be helping the person next to me but he is too close and waving his arms about, flashbacks, I ask if he can not stand over me, and only then does he move round to the other side of the other computer where he isn't standing over anyone, why didn't he stand there before?
I try very hard to fit in with things and people and cope with what people do, I can't always manage it though.

Tomorrow I should get some money and I will be able to sort out essentials like toiletries and clean clothes, that is something to look forward to, clean clothes!
I will be able to get phone credit tomorrow and reply to a text my friend sent me two weeks ago, she is a good friend, I wear a bracelet and a cross that she gave me. She wants me to be a Christian still, she wants me to be part of her denomination, but I can't because of what has happened.

My friend is on facebook, she is asking if I want to house share with one of her family, in a way I do, but this house is about 500 miles away and I do not know if it would work, even if I could get there.

I haven't been back to the other daycentre since the attempt to involve social services, but I think about my life and I remember a girl there who is in a really bad way, she is very loud and her voice is harsh with alcohol and drugs, she keeps openly propositioning the men there, but to my surprise none of them are interested, even when she takes her sweatshirt off so that her bust is spilling out of her top they don't glance at her, she tried to get P. once, he wasn't in the slightest bit interested, she is so desparate, she is all made up but her teeth are half missing and she is dressed in a tracksuit and vest with no bra. One time I was with P. or one of the others, looking at the picture of me in the paper at the protest site and she decided we were laughing at her.