This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Friday, 22 February 2013

morning peeps,
last night I eventually let go of my book and fell into an uneasy sleep with terrors,
I was woken by a cup of tea at some unearthly hour and had to have five more cups in order to revive.
I have now been an indoorsperson for two weeks I think, I don't really really like it but it is a necessary weevil, maybe, perhaps. Please can I go back to my nice porch now?
My friend says that technically I am no longer a ruff sleepah.
grr. Indoors is hot and dry, people should live outdoors much more often.

Well anyway, my friend and I went to the bank this morning and then I was left in charge of the shop for an hour, I was joined by my lovely assistant eventually and I had put on his time sheet 'Late again!' as a joke but he was ever so apologetic and I fell about laughing.

I am just waiting for some news.
I am at the shop, one of the senior volunteers has taken over and my friend and the assistant have gone to adoration in one of the district churches.

Thursday, 21 February 2013

Hey peeps,
excuse the blog being a mess for a while, I react badly to antibiotics and people telling me how to live.

Yesterday I went to MIND and talked through with them about my friend trying to tell me I had to forgive the church and they said that if my friend didn't even know what had happened between me and the church, then she should not intervene and forgiveness is a process and no one can tell me to do it.
MIND advised me to take time out, and that is why I caught a train and had time out with some boiled sweets in the cheerful bed and breakfast and sorted out my messy backpack and returned this morning.

Last night I sent an email to my friends, just as a courtesy to say all was well and they responded with delight.

This morning when I returned to town I went to the bookshop and chatted to my friends and left my bag there and went to counselling.
I still find counselling an endurance, but it was a bit easier this time, maybe.

Then I went back to the bookshop until closing time and read a book and also took 3 books as a load of new ones had come in.
My friends had asked if I was coming home, so I did.

Wednesday, 20 February 2013

hello peeps,
please don't ring me from Romford at this time of night to talk about the Holy Spirit, my brain calls it a day by 8pm.

I have escaped on the big roaring long distance train to my little bolthole here, and I am in seclusion and subsiding on boiled sweets.
I need some me time, I am the Jayne who walks by herself , and no, I will not be tempted by saucers of tea, sometimes I need space, lots of space.
Hi peeps,
The obligatory blog post, which doesn't seem to have a point to it.
I went to sleep, or tried to, din't get much sleep,
didn't have breakfast, listened to my friend going on at me and decided it was time to live outdoors, my friend thinks my life is as simple as just forgiving the people who have hurt me, as if that would make it all better.
Living indoors is hard because I forget to wash and I get sick from sleeping indoors, when I left my friends' house I went and had a wash and got my breakfast at McD's, it felt good to be out on my own again.
one blog reader is reading because they are worried I might put bad things about their church on here.
In your dreams, your church is not important enough. My dislike of churches is not really part of my blog.

Tuesday, 19 February 2013

I went to friendship group but didn't feel like friendship or food, and the hot dog and soup were unappetising.
I went to the shop and read a book, for ages.

Went to the jobcentre and the lady understood everything perfectly and helped me to fill in forms and transfer claims.

My DLA was in today but I am not using it, I am saving it.

Home for supper and my friends have gone out to an appointment and I am typing letters.
nothing has happened since I last spoke to you,
I slept on the sofa and woke all groggy as usual.
Finished the antibiotics but my gum is no better.

Monday, 18 February 2013

sadly not many people are reading the new blog, it is just getting spam statistics.
Hey peeps,

sorry about my grump yesterday about old ladies.

I felt so ill today that I cancelled my appointment with MIND, I had missed going to a concert because of my MIND appointment but I was too ill to go to a concert anyway, so I sat in the shop and dreamed, we did well for books anyway.
Eventually it was closing time and we headed home, via the post office.

My angelic old friend came out of the post office as I waited for my friend to do his post office stuff, my angelic old friend walked past me and swiped my walking stick and walked on, telling me he needed the stick more than I did, then he came back and asked how the book was going, and he told me I was to finish writing it by August 18th as that is his Birthday and he wants the first copy of the book.

We got accosted by several other lovely people who we variously knew from the churches and then we came home and I was tucked up in the duvet on the sofa for a sleep as I was feeling so rotten.

I woke up to a cup of tea and feeling a bit better and then we had supper, I had a horse pie.
Hi peeps,
I am groggy and foggy and painful. I am sure people should not live indoors or eat antibiotics.
It leads to painkillers and feeling sick.


Yesterday we went litterpicking but it was a bit muddled because I had my stick as well as a litterpicker and we only had one rubbish bag and one recycling bag between us.
So I only stayed an hour and went on to catch a train and a boat and a train.

I wandered into the welfare drop in and they fed me and got me tea and tried to give me clothes and food parcels.
then I went to look at a room, I liked the landlord but it is too out of the way and I don't think I can raise the deposit without a miracle. The landlord hoped I would take the room, especially as I enthused about his keenness for recycling.
But I don't think I can take it, because while I am not driving, which I will be when I am settled, it is too out of the way, but I need to be somewhere static in order to build back up to driving and it would be difficult in the meantime.

Anyway, I came back here and was tired but my friends go to bed late, eventually I went to bed and fell asleep and slept through the night, but I woke up feeling ghastly.
I still feel ghastly and the painkillers made no difference.

Sunday, 17 February 2013

Hi peeps,
I hate Sundays,
Sunday is when all the wretched old people come out of the woodwork to go to church, legalize euthenasia please!

I have also been recruited to the choir and am trying to wriggle out of it. Mice down necks or claiming to be a broken soprano maybe.
I assured the choimaster that I cannot get enough air in my lungs due to asthma, but he came up with a solution, so I am now a damn choir member again after years of avoiding it. At least the choirmaster is a nice patient guy, not an asshole like the last one.
Peeps, I hate the world, especially rude old ladies.

I hate sundays, apart from if I can go to the cafe and read the paper.

Anyway. I slept on the sofa last night after doing a lot of writing, I slept deeply and woke up from a dream about an outdoor bath, I kept thinking the bath would be cold but it was nice and warm, I woke and it was early o'clock and my friend was in the kitchen with the kettle on, I had three cuppas but was not in a food mood so I avoided my breakfast and my antibiotic, my mouth is no better anyway and I am on the last of the antibiotics.
I did have a good intellectual conversation with my friend as well, but I still can't ask  questions. Then we set off for church and this old rude lady came along and interrupted our conversation and barged in, trying to barge between me and my friend and taking over the conversation, so I decided to wander off, and never made it to mass, yay! I hate church.
and even so, I kept bumping into church people as I nosed around town.

Well I went to the cafe and read the papers and went to church after mass and ended up being plied with hot drinks and smiled at, oh yay, good for you, church peeps, I love you too :(
And I got recruited to the choir, flee the town.
Here I am, I finally had an antibiotic and I feel dizzy. I did have it with coffee and a belgian bun.

We are litterpicking this afternoon and then I am wandering off.

Saturday, 16 February 2013

you can now comment on the blog. But I will know who you are and I will clout you if you nark me.
A stressy day at the shop and a nice enough meal at the community group, but I was quite dopey and groggy and achy, probably from a mix of antibiotics and the strain of the journey and effort yesterday.

I had a walk around town after the shop closed, and had a coffee at the cafe and came back here.
morning peeps,
get your lazy selves out of bed.

I was tired and I think I slept more deeply and the terrors were more vague but the flashbacks when I was half asleep this morning and couldn't wake up very well were the same.

so I wandered through a few cups of tea, and some toast so I could take my meds.

and here I am, we are off to the shop at 10am and then I am going to the community group for some tea and chatter and lunch.

the psychologist told me to ask questions, so I am going to try :/ I never ask questions.

Friday, 15 February 2013

Hi peeps,
I got home peacefully but tired enough to sleep halfway up a lamp post.
I revived a bit and am trying to prepare for the nightly hell of flashbacks, nightmares and terrors, ie bed time and sleep time.
Hey peeps,
I went to see the psychologist and that went very well.
Wow! Psychologist knows and understands things, he is one of the only people in the world who actually understands why I do things and why I am all messed up.

Then I had fish and chips and looked at the sea, and here I am drinking tea again.
I just had my last antibiotic of the day, I have to have it with food otherwise it makes me poorly.

I was hoping to catch a train after I saw the psychologist but he was slightly late and the trains were already crowded by then and so I am waiting for rush hour to end before I catch the train.

Hey peeps,
last night I slept on the sofa and had the usual severe distress and horror and flashbacks.
I was woken again at some unearthly hour because I was going on a journey today, I didn't wake properly though, even though a nice bath had been run for me and a cup of tea was waved under my nose. I decided that the next train would do fine, eventually I wandered out of bed, still asleep, and told my friend that waking up should be illegal.

I had some toast, or did I? I was still asleep.
Then I went in the bath and washed my hair, that woke me up.

My friend dropped me off at the station and I made the hour and twenty minute journey here to the town where my psychologist is. I had a peaceful journey, the train was not too crowded.

It is a lovely sunny day here, the sea is shining happily, everyone is noisy and all over the place and I have been shopping for underwears and things and am sitting in a cafe drinking tea, how nice. Half an hour to go until torture time.

Thursday, 14 February 2013

Hi peeps,
I suppose I had better natter at you seeing as you grump when I don't.

Yesterday evening after much deliberating I decided not to go to Ash Wednesday Mass, so I stayed at the flat and watched television while the others went.

We found out that the demonstration and meeting that they were due to go to tomorrow were cancelled, after they had put huge effort into organizing it all. They were miffed.
I was also due to join the demo, (I had offered to clibm lamp posts and burn things but it was due to be a peaceful demo). I was also due to have sole charge of the shop for a whole 15 minutes and lock up at closing (scary). But the demo was cancelled so I have not a care in the world.

Anyway, at the end of the day I slept on the sofa and had another rough rough night with nightmares and flashbacks and half-awake distresses and being hot and needing the loo.

In the morning I was woken by a cup of tea at some unearthly hour as we were due to go to mass at 7am! well there was to be breakfast afterwards.

Unfortunately I was worried about forgetting my antibiotic and took it with my first cup of tea.
By the time we got to mass I felt really sick and thought I would either vomit or faint or simply run from mass because the flashbacks were so severe.

But I survived, and we got to breakfast, I cautiously opted for toast and we sat at a table with a load of people who also mainly ordered toast.
I chewed toast and drank tea, but a certain person thought I might be hungry and brought me over a full breakfast with FOUR sausages! I am sure it is illegal to have four sausages as well as bacon and eggs and rolls after having toast. Anyway, my friend had one of these sausages for me :)

Then we went home but I was still giddy so I went back to sleep on the sofa. My friend said I could sleep until 11 when her husband was going out as she was going out again straight away, so I slept, I had a dream that her husband came to woke me up and told me I would get better because St. Francis had been at Mass last night, I woke with a jump and wondered if I had been dreaming or not as it was very vivid, I went into the kitchen and asked him if he had come and woken me and told him about the dream, he laughed and told me it was a dream but St. Francis was at Mass last night.

I went to the shop and stashed my bag and told one of the volunteers all about my toof, because she wanted to know, then I went and got my walking stick from my hedge and then I went to counselling, counselling was tough but it is early days and I need to persevere.
Then I went to get my new boots, I got a pair of boots and I am
My mood varies between 15 and 19 on the mood checker at the moment. Nothing remarkable.

I just went to do some shopping, all I seem to buy is meds and health stuff, I got some more 5-HTP and some Bonjela for this wretched gum that hurts so much, apart from that I just got some razors and shower gel and things, how boring.

The temperature is up, the sun is shining, it was snowing yesterday but I think winter is over now.
how sad :(

Yesterday a lady with a little girl said hello to me, she was wearing a hat and I didn't know who she was but she knew who I was, she informed me that they were doing the school run, which left me none the wiser.
I wish I knew who people were, wish I was normal and could recognise people.

Wednesday, 13 February 2013

after all those years starved of pancakes on shrove tuesday, I got double pancaked yesterday as we had pancaked for supper as well.

Did I tell you that 'No more nails' does not glue boots back together? well it doesn't it just leaves your boots covered in white gel.

too much stress, peeps.
Hm, the jobcentre were as muddled as usual, I went to get an appointment so they could transfer my claim here but they tried to give me a 'work focussed interview' and told me I had to phone ESA, well what is the point of that when I need an appointment to help phone ESA? well this is how useless they are, I did try to ask someone who used to work for them what to do because I knew it would get stressful and nasty, but he never replied to my email at all.

sometimes I despair

no, I just despair always, full stop.
Hi peeples,

Today I went to the dentist and asked if I could bite a dentist please? They made me an appointment for 1200 midday and I went to the shop and stashed my backpack and sat at the desk as the others all had to go out and there was only the lady who indexes the books.

I went to the dentist and waited for ages and then the dentist saw me and said he would leave my bad toof in and give me antibiotics instead, so I have lethal antibiotics as I can't take penicillin.

So I picked up the prescription and also some yakult stuff in order to keep my belly happy while I am on antibiotics.

And here I am in the shop.
I have to go and try to deal with the jobcentre at 3pm :( nightmare, I just need to register there because I seem to be staying in this area now, but I have no c/o address and I am worried that they may not register me, but no one seems to be able to advise me what to do about this. It looks like the repeat of the nightmare where they refused me my benefits a while back.

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

Hi peeps,
Back at the shop I sorted all the new books out.
There was a sandwich there for me but I had had lunch at friendship group, so I saved the sandwich for tomorrow.

I went and cleared all my solid posessions out of the hedge and took them to store at the back of the shop and sorted out my bedding to make it less conspicuous in the hedge as the gardener had asked.
Tomorrow I will sort all my things from the hedge, I had been meaning to move and sort it for a long time.

When the shop closed we went to the recycling plant, which was a short drive away, and then we returned by the scenic route and I am watching tv while the others are busy and we will have supper soon. It is very cold outside.
I am temporarily domesticated but it makes me hot and restless and increases the flashbacks and distress and nightmares and I get hot and dry and bloaty at night. I am not good at indoors.

I am also having the recurring problem that my left foot is freezing! Here I am indoors and wearing thick thermal socks and that foot will not warm up! It also has a sore on it and my mouth is full of sore as well
:( grump grump.
Hi peeps,
we came to the shop and I started to put the new books out, but I ran out of stickers.
Then I went to the community group.
I really don't like chicken burgers, they are so dry.
We did have pancakes though :) syrup!

it is 'shove Tuesday' according to the magazine.

I am back at the shop.
Good morning peeps,
I slept indoors again.

I know how people end up living indoors, they watch the television and forget all about how nice outdoors is.
I am not very good at indoors, I got another bite on my arm, some naughty thing has been chewing me, how rude of it. I don't chew people even when I want to.

My washing is all drying nicely.

I had nightmares last night and I am not good at the hot dry heat of indoors cos it dry my skin and my tubes out.

Monday, 11 February 2013

We were just watching the resignation speech of the Pope.
There is a man in the background who looks like a frog and he is making such a face about the Pope's speech.
I will keep adding to the other blog, peeps, so do keep reading it :)

I have infection in my mouth. Recently I had a huge blood blister on the roof of my mouth and it exploded and there was blood everywhere and then it got infected and now my gums are infected too. yeek!

I went shopping this morning and got some things.

eyup peeps,
The eyupmeducks have been reading the blog like mad, whats up?

Wow what a day.
I left my bag at the shop for a while and went to nose around the town but I heard a shout, the shout was someone who knew me. She was really getting all enthusiastic to see me and was saying she had been so worried and things, I wasn't sure why, I haven't seen her for a few months but she knows very well that I wander dozily around and flit like a butterflytypething so she shouldn't be worried if she doesn't see me.

Anyway, she borrowed me and fed me coffee.
Then she took me to get food vouchers, just in case I need them and I laughed because she said that someone had told her they had seen me clearing up litter, there are eyes everywhere, even the phantom litterpicker gets spotted.
She gave me some chocolates and goodies as well and patted me on the head and sent me on my way.

I went back to the shop kitchen and put the goodies on the table for everyone.
sat in the shop briefly, eating food from yesterday's party but it was snowing so beautifully that I wandered off and checked the church garden for litter and got kidnapped by the lovely lady vicar.

The vicar fed me coffee and talked, and she gave me a packet of fruit and nuts left over from christmas! haha, I am being spoiled rotten! And off I wandered for my appointment at MIND.
At MIND we looked at early warning signs of the depression and trauma problems and we looked at strategies to prevent the early warning signs developing into full blown problems.

Then I went back to the shop and wrote an email instead of sorting the new books out like I was supposed to, I will do them tomorrow.
It has stopped snowing and I am in the library.
Good morning you peeps you,

please make a complaint if you are viewing this and you are not a peep,
write your complaint on a postcard and post it in a nearby litterbin.

Last night we played scrabble, I neither lost nor won, I only survived by nicking all the triple word scores.

Then I went to sleep on the sofa, it is a firm sofa so my back is ok with it, I slept most of the night but I did feel a bit hot and bloaty, how do you peeps survive living in hot indoors houses?
I woke up from a nightmare this morning and wandered into some toast and three cups of tea.

The weather is grey and drizzly and I am going to terrorize the town and also fish my clothes out of the hedge so they can have a wash. I need to throw these jeans away as they are so holey they could be a priest.

Sunday, 10 February 2013

Hi peeps,
We went to the healing service after lunch, I panicked and missed most of the service but there was a slap up tea afterwards and people kept feeding me in case I was hungry and they let me escape with a few tubs of snacks, which I will take to the shop tomorrow - if there is anything left.

The weather is cold with heavy rain and sleet.

We are watching the football, huh.

Hi peeps,

Here is a new blog, the intention is that you get some of my best homeless stories and experiences that aren't necessarly told complete in the blog.

This new blog is in response to people asking for homeless stories.

oops I gave you the wrong blog address earlier, sorry :)

Hi peeps,
I like earlier church services cos you get to escape church while it is still morning, not lunchtime.

Last night I had a bath and was all clean and then I went to sleep here at my friends' house on their sofa, it is a firm sofa so I thought it would be ok, and it was, I woke at 2.30am frm nightmares and was uneasy and needed the loo, so I used the loo and went back to bed, I slept until morning and shuffled out of the sitting room and my friends were already having breakfast, I had some tea and toast and tried to wet down my wild hair and then we went to church.

church was ok apart from the usual crowdedness and too much touching, I don't like being touched :(
But the guy who accidentally pawed me when he scrambled over me to get his coat apologised and gave me a £10 (he knows I'm homeless and I told him I didn't need money but he gave me money anyway.

We got back here and had coffee and later we have lunch and then go to the healing service.
I am watching Tom and Gerry.

Saturday, 9 February 2013

Hi peeps,

I was invited home when the shop closed, one of my friends was on a course and the other had to go to the laundry so I sat here in their house and watched short circuit and now they are back and I am watching short cicuit again on repeat on the other channel.

My friends have asked me if I would like to have a bath and stay the night so I will be out of the cold and away from the drunks etc.

hm, cup of tea :)
Hi peeps,
are you being good? behave yourselves!

Well yesterday I went to the library when the shop closed and I daydreamed with the computer.

Then I went to my friend's house as I had been invited for fish and chips.
I stayed the evening at my friends' house and watched their television and tested the delicious scones that my friend was making for the coffee morning.
Eventually I returned to my sleeping place and tucked down in the blankets, I fell straight into a dead sleep and didn't wake until 7am again, I am sleeping well but I feel tired a lot.
I climbed reluctantly out of my cloud of warm comfy blankets and wandered into the rainy morning.

I went to McD's for my brekky and then went and had my wash, then I went to help with the coffee morning, I helped set up and serve and wash up and do everything at coffee morning, there was a brief power cut but that was ok, then I wandered off to the community group.

There was another power cut but thankfully the lunch was already cooked, one of the servers told us we were having the winner of the 11.50 at Doncaster for lunch.
It was a good roast meal and afterwards I came back here to the shop. Here I am, I have Angela's Ashes on the video player.
The weather is both cold and wet, so wot.

Friday, 8 February 2013

Hi peeps,
excuse the lack of blog recently, I have been prodded out of my stoopor to write for you.
Nyark nyark.

Hm, on Wednesday evening I sat in on confirmation class and that was good, then I went riding on the buses and that ended up not so good, a nasty incident that left me traumatised.
I am in one piece though, physically.

I didn't get a good sleep on Wednesday night due to being deeply upset.

Thursday morning I was still upset but I came to the bookshop and did some odds and ends including sitting at the desk and scaring the customers off :)
The office got crowded as it sometimes does and my friend phoned, she asked what I was doing ' dancing round the shop' I told her truthfully,  but she didn't believe me.

When the shop closed I returned to the library and sat quietly in there.
My friend had told me to go to her house for 6.30 so we could go to a church course together, and I did, but the course dates were mixed up and so there was no course, and so we went home and I stayed the evening at my friend's house and watched tv and had some potato and beans, then I went back to my sleepy place and bedded down and was asleep instantly in the beautiful cold clear night.

I woke this morning dehydrated and overheated and rushed to McD's for orange juice as well as my usual tea and bagel.

Then I went to mass but felt too ill to stay for the whole of mass and went to the loo in case I was sick and waited for mass to finish, when mass finished I had a cuppa with everyone and then helped the recycling group with bottle tops for an house and then came to the shop, my lunch was waiting for me at the shop, as well as lots of tea and videos and I am still here, I am on my computer and watching Austin powers as well.

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Hi peeps,
I went to the shop this morning and was working sorting videos out, I found some more of my old favourites, the Naked Gun films (Leslie Neilsen) and watched one of those.
I drank lots of tea and took the now dry blanket back to the hedge and took the last wet blanket to the shop to hang up to dry.

The videos are all sorted out now and I have loads of videos to watch when I go to the shop, as well as thousands of books to read.
My friend never wants his lunch on days when he goes to the doctors, so I de-beetrooted it and ate it for him.
Beetroot looks like afterbirth, how can anyone eat it? :)

This evening I have been told I can sit in on confirmation class and drink tea.

The weather is cold in the strong winds but no snow yet, freezing rain last night but I stayed dry.
morning peeps,

Yesterday when the library closed I went to the church and adored and then went on the buses, it was a rainy cold night and I wandered around, there was no sign of that rough sleeper.

I came back and sat and listened to the choir. Then I got some chips and went back on the buses.

The rain stopped by the time I went to my sleeping place but the wind remained.
I tucked down and was asleep immediately.
I slept through the night and woke from nightmares when the alarm went off, I was very warm and comfy and I snuggled in my blankets until 7am while the wind raged outside.

Then I got up, stashed everything and came here to McD's for breakfast.

Tuesday, 5 February 2013

Hi peeps,

Last night when the library closed I went on the buses.
In one of the towns there was a man trying to sleep on the bus station floor, no sign of alcohol but that is not a rough sleeper town and he had no cardboard and just a foil blanket over him, which was being blown by the wind.
I went back on the bus and went to my store hedge and got two of my blankets and two cardboard boxes and a handwarmer, but by the time I got back the man had gone. He may have realised there was no way he could sleep like that without getting sick from the cold, or he may have been moved on or someone may have rescued him, I prayed that he would be ok and I had a look round the area but he wasn't there.

Last night was due to be freezing with strong cold winds. I went back to my sleeping place and tucked in, expecting a cold and disrupted night, I put one handwarmer in my sleeping bag and one in the neck of my thermal top. I fell asleep and slept soundly until early morning when I woke to the sound of traffic and life waking up and I snuggled in for a comfy and warm few minutes before getting up.

I went to McD's for breakfast and left a wet blanket where I could pick it up and take it to the shop to dry out later.
I had my tea and bagel at McD's, they have a guy there who keeps messing up people's orders, he must be new but I was sure he worked there before.
After breakfast I went for a wash and then sat waiting for the library to open.
There was a rude old church lady (one of many), who came up and jabbed my arm and started on at me, excuse me for being rude but I wish the rich and rude narrow old ladies would leave me and my arms alone. They are not nice people and now I have stopped going to the cafe because I don't really want to be among church people and listen to their whining and gossiping, I wish they would leave me alone. I need to learn to be a real person but I haven't got to the point where I know how to deal with mean-spirited old church people yet.

Anyway, the library opened and I went on the computer and then headed for the community group, had some tea and got my nails done and then went to drop my wet blanket off at the shop where it was spread out to dry.

I went back to community group and had my lunch and went back to the shop, the blanket was dry so I took it back to the hedge and took another one to dry at the shop. I was supposed to be on duty at the shop but I am always on call and they had several other helpers so I sat in the office and watched Buffy videos and drank tea and read a Buffy book.

When the shop closed I went to the post office and got the last of my money and got some handwarmers from the outdoors shop. I will survive this cold spell.

It is sunny and bright now with a freezing wind but it is due to snow, sleet and be cold and rainy.

Monday, 4 February 2013

Hey peeps,
I went for lunch and then to the bookshop for a cuppa, and ended up staying there a while.

Good morning peeps,
The sun is shining, how dangerous.

Last night I stayed out late on the buses and eventually came home and went to bed, tucked up warm and comfy I slept through the night and only woke slightly to roll over.
Dragged myself out of the blanket pile reluctantly this morning and wandered into McD's and had the usual.

Thankfully the burger van is back and so I had a cuppa there to take my meds with and went and had a wash, eventually the library opened and here I am.

Sunday, 3 February 2013

Riding around on the buses, waiting for the end of the day.
It is mild, cloudy and dry.
Hi peeps,
I met my friend this morning as I wandered around and she told me to come round for a bath at 1pm.

I had a cuppa at the cafe and went to church to say hello after mass because I was too tired to go to mass.

I am still very tired.
I wandered around feeling like death and only remembering the bad things, eventually I went to have a bath.
I had a quick but thorough bath and then went and fished my lunch parcel out of the hedge and I am back in the cafe now.

I will probably get a bus ticket and go on the buses rather than keep walking around feeling bad.
Morning peeps,
yesterday morning we set off for London, we stopped at Chertsey and picked our friend up and arrived in London in time for a cup of tea.

The first thing on the agenda was mass, and so we had mass, and then lunch, the usual excellent soup and bread, and as usual I ended up feeling very full.
Then I worked in the gardens and had fun doing that, it was cold but not too cold outdoors and it stayed dry.
Then we had a talk by the priest and that was good.
Then there was a tea break and then Holy Hour and Evening Prayer, and my friend and I went to confession during Holy Hour.
Then it was supper time and this is when I got a bit panicky and overwhelmed and grouchy because I got crowded, but it settled down.
It was an excellent chicken curry for supper and some lovely cake for pudding.

Then we set off back, we stopped at Chertsey and had a cuppa and I put my thermals on as it was becoming freezing cold.
Then off we went and I was dropped off at the station.
For the first time ever I got an earlier train and it wasn't too noisy, arrived home by midnight, got a cuppa at the burger van and went to my sleeping place, my friend had given me a sleeping bag, so I blanketed up and tucked down and slept, woke needing the loo at 3am, it was freezing cold! Tucked back in and slept until 7am and here I am.

Friday, 1 February 2013

Hey peeps,
I stayed in the library, had a potato for lunch and eventually went to mass and came here to my friends and we are off to London in the morning.
Hi peeps,
Yesterday evening I went foraging for supper with the last of my change.
I found a small steak and kidney pie and a chocolate bar.
Then I came back here and watched television and computed until bed time.

The room was hot so I had the windows open (curtains closed) and slept in my underwears.
I slept well, deep dreamless sleep and woke without flashbacks.
I woke a few minutes before the alarm and wandered down for breakfast.

There were some workmen hogging the breakfast bar so I waited and felt thirsty for a while and then I got my orange juice and tea and toast and the nice lady brought me the sausage and egg and bacon.

I am just relaxing and I will have a shower in a minute and be all ready to check out at 10am.
Today I will have a wander round this beloved town and enjoy the shops and the atmosphere, and I will go in the library and then I will meet my friends at mass tonight.

I will answer all my emails when I get to the library!