This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Hi Peeps,

yesterday evening I had a walk around, listening to my radio on top volume, then I went to church for Bible study, at the end of Bible study several people wanted to offer me a bed for the night because the weather was so wild and wet and windy, but I explained that I simply cannot sleep in a bed, so they offered me floors instead.
One of them is too much for me so I politely turned her down, but the other two are lovely and eventually they persuaded me.
They lived quite a long way from church, I was actually surprised, but they both work for the church and actually work in a number of churches accross the district.

They live right on the tip of the island, next to a tidal creek that goes into the sea, they have five dogs, four collies and one terrier, and the dogs are lovely, so I was happy with that.
When we got to the house they made me a hot meal and I tucked down on a lovely big soft rug, under a big soft duvet that smelled of soap and wood smoke, and I wandered around the rug and fell asleep.

In the morning I woke and wondered if the barky collie would bark and wake the whole house if I went to the loo. But by the time I got up, one of the ladies was up and she was in her dressing gown, icing a cake for a Birthday, she is another cake maker, I wonder why I meet so many people who do this as a hobby.

I had some nice tea and toast for my breakfast, this household believes in tea, which is good.
The weather was wild and stormy, lovely, the dogs went for a pee and I stood outside looking at the creek and the harbour in the storm, the swift spring tide was hurrying out.

I snuggled back in the duvet on the sofa but when one of the ladies went to walk the dogs I went with her, we took them in the car to a beach the other side of the island, hyper dogs in cars is always a pain.
We walked across the dunes and along the beach, the howling wind made my ears hurt but it was beautiful, I could almost pretend I was home and that I was walking on the West beach and it was too windy for sailing. I had to keep my brain asleep and just confuse it with this dream rather than grieving for the reality of the situation. Over the water the other island loomed and made the dream/reality more vivid.

We went home for more tea, and as I was chatting with the other lady she suggested I wrote an article for the church magazine that she was just preparing, an article on homelessness, so I did that, it will be my second article for different church magazines and this article is to help explain to church people how they can help the homeless.

Then it was time to come back here and we went to the church, one lady had a meeting to go to with the priest in another town and the other lady and I were due to be working on Christmas fete preparations but there was an hour to go before that started, so I went to see if I could get a shower but the lady still wasn't there, I am worried for her now.
I went over the road and the church sitters were the ones who dissaprove of the homeless, and there was another homeless woman there, newly out on the streets, helpess and struggling as I was in my first weeks on the street and she had no bedding and the church sitters didn't really want to help, so I tried to find the lady from the basics bank and couldn't so I got this woman some of my blankets and didn't know what else to do. She needs to be herself and not have anyone patronizing her, but no one can be out without bedding at this time of year, tension from cold and lack of sleep are killers.

I went back to help with the fete preparations and have had an awful time producing hearts to raise money for Romania, I love to help but I hate craft!

I will see what I can do to further help the other homeless woman later, and I will also go back to fete preparations this evening, and I have been offered another night in and seeing as it isn't making me ill and the flashbacks are controllable, I may well do that.

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