Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Saturday, 17 November 2012

Good morning peeps,

I stayed with my friends until yesterday evening and then they were going to something they were invited to, so they dropped me off somewhere.
The somewhere where they dropped me off was somewhere where I used to live.
I only lived there for a few months during a really bad time when I had to take refuge because giving evidence was so distressing and I needed to get away from seeing my abusers everywhere I went, especially as he used to laugh when he saw me, as if it was all a joke and not something that destroyed me.
Anyway, I wandered around and remembered vaguely, living and working here, delivery driving late at night, listening to 'Midnight Rain' on repeat.

Eventually I caught the train and wandered back here.
It wasn't late when I got back to this town, so I sat in subway for a while with a cuppa, it got crowded with cinema goers, I hate weekend nights, everywhere is noisy and crowded.

I went and bedded down ealry despite everything, and it was a mild night, I lay there and watched the clear sky turn cloudy, which is always interesting to watch, and then I slept despite the usual weekend noise, but I was in and out of sleep.
I got up for the loo at some point, and at one point it was raining lightly despite no rain forecast for this area, so my top layer of blanket pile got a bit wet but I was dry and snug. I was without my balaclava as it had fallen out of the bag into the hedge and I hadn't noticed, but I was wrapped up enough.

I woke at 7am this morning feeling ill, usually a day of painkillers makes the illness I get from being indoors go away, but this time it didn't, so I woke in pain.
I went to McD's and got my usual breakfast of tea and bagel and I took 500mg co-codamol and 500mg ibruprophen (which I am not supposed to use), but the thing is, ibruprophen is the effective one as it is an anti-inflammatory and the problem is inflammation.
But despite these meds, the pain refuses to shift and my stomach keeps turning and I know I will vomit at some point. :(
Who can I be sick over?

I went to the church and they are rehearsing for something tomorrow, I sat a while but when they invited me to sing I told them I was more likely to be sick if I did.

I went looking for some jeans in the chattery shops but found nothing suitable, so I came here, then I got a text from the vicar saying she has got the fuel tablets for me. So I will collect those later.

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