This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Monday, 1 October 2012

Hello bloggypeeps,
Remind me never to travel on a Sunday, the trains are too busy, everywhere is closed and it is not fun.

I went up to the station after my cuppa in McD's, but the price of the first train had gone up, I needed more money anyway, and I had not washed and had a proper breakfast.
I wasn't looking forward to going all the way back accross town to the cash point with my heavy bags, so I decided to stop at the market for tea hour, and have my wash at the market toilets.

I got to the market and the Puppet man was counting his money, he offered me a handful of money and asked if he could buy me a tea, I agreed to a tea, but he wanted to buy me a bacon roll too, he likes to help the homeless so I let him buy me my breakfast.

He told me that the lot up the row were talking squit, and they probably were.
Then he started talking about a daughter who he fathered with a chat line girl, he says that his daughter doesn't know him but she now also does the chat lines, he was speculating on what would happen if he phoned her up and said 'Hello, it's your daddy here!'
I said that she would probably say 'Daddy, can I have all that maintenance that you owe!'
Puppet Man thought that was funny.
But he went on about television X and Bluebird and the chat lines.
He never misbehaves with me but he does talk about some outrageous things, to everyone.

A few cups of tea and a bacon roll later, I was off to have my wash and get some money, then I got the hopper bus and hopped down to the station.

The train was crowded, it was not even a train with opening windows :( but that was only the first leg of the journey, and it stopped at all the stations.
When we arrived at the station where I changed trains, the crowds were unbearable, nothing was sign posted, we arrived late, I couldn't run once I had worked out the connecting train, and so I missed the train I was meant to change to.
But I got the next one, and it was a fast train, and it was a big long train, with some opening windows, I  got a seat in a quiet carriage and dozed and I enjoyed the view and we didn't stop until we arrived in london.

In London I got the interconnecting service on the underground very easily and with no problems.
Got to the station for the next leg of the journey and got a cuppa and hurried to the loo.

The train was simply too crowded, the corridors were packed, so I jumped off and panicked, one of the station staff checked that I was ok and gruffly told me I could wait in peace and quiet on the station for an hour until the next train. But I had other ideas, I went and got some snacks and checked with the Information desk about a train that I thought I could get sooner than an hour and change trains again, they said I could do that and it would get me there quicker than the one in an hour, so I did that.

Again the train was crowded but as I panicking looked for a space, a man moved his coat off the seat next to him and gestured that I could sit there, so I sat, he dozed off and I sat, with my rucksack on my lap and my black bag of bedding and clothes squeezed into the parcel shelf at the end of the carriage among huge piles of suitcases, I was afraid I would never see it again because I couldn't keep an eye on it and there were so many people in the corridor and so many cases.

As we went on the train grew quieter and I ended up alone in a seat with my bags next to me, there was a power socket so I briefly got to charge this power huingry old mobile phone.

The last leg where I once again changed trains for a very short journey, panicking again because of the crowds and lack of signs or familiarity.
I found a quiet corridor in the train and I found my bottle of disinfectant in my bag and diluted a capful with water and gargled it to try and cure my sore throat.

We arrived at our destiantion, and I struggled along with my bags and walked and walked.
I was hoping to find a church that was doing a Sunday evening service, some familiarity in worship, and church people who knew the city and could advise me.

One church after another turned out to be either in ruins of converted to something else. a bit like in the town I had left in the morning.
I couldn't even find a McD's.

At last after struggling up a long steep hill, I found a church and a lady going into the church, I asked her if there was a service and she said there was, we talked and I came in with her to the service, which I enjoyed, and the sermon was particularly moving, relevant to me.
afterwards the church people found me a booklet on homeless services in the city, and one of them gave me a lift to McD's and gave me two pounds towards my hot drinks and things.

I sat in McD's, put a little note on the blog to tell you that I had arrived safely, and had several cups of tea before using the toilet as a changing room to put my thermals on.

I had seen a potential sleeping place, and I went to check it out. yes it would do.
so I tucked down, and dozed off, dreamed that the police found me and said into their radios 'only a rough sleeper, nothing worse'.
Then I woke, because it was raining, I crawled into the nearby porch to shelter but the ends of my legs and my feet remained out in the open and getting wet, nothing I could do about that.

I dozed on and off through the night, and considering it was a first night in a strange town I actually did quite well both for sleep and for shelter.
I woke at 4.45am, the end of the sleeping bag was soaked and I was shivering, I hadn't found any cardboard to sleep on.

I got up and unwisely dumped the sleeping bag in the nearest rubbish bin, I simply didn't want to carry a wet sleeping bag with an already to heavy load.
putting the sleeping bag in the bin may give me away and lead to me being moved on or hassled by the outreach or other people. So I need a new spot.

I walked into town and got a tea and a bagel with philadelphia light, I read the metro and looked at the booklet of homeless services. 5.15am, McD's here is open 5am-11pm.

according to the book, there is a breakfast outreach at the bus station from 7.30-8am.
It is now 6am, so I stagger on with my bags, to continue orientating myself with the town.

I take another gargle of disinfectant and wish I had some TCP, it tastes better and is more effective, the sore throat and rattly chest is now obviously a streaming miserable cold. It is the second cold I have had in the last few months and I don't normally get colds or the flu.
I wish I could afford some of the magic medicine that the pharmacist recommended for me last time, but it costs £5.

I have 70p left, I go into Sainsburys to get a carton of fruit juice, and I find £5 that someone has dropped. I am not going to spend it on medicine as I need money for food and hot drinks anyway, I get another cuppa at McD's.

I go to the bus station and wait, and wait, the booklet was published last year and some of it must be out of date, there is no sign of a breakfast run anywhere in that vicinity, what a shame.

I go back into town and wait for the Post Office to open, I withdraw my last few pounds and I get a bottle of cheaper medicine.
Then I go for a thorough wash in the toilets and change my socks, knickers and teeshirt and take my thermals and jumper off.

Off I go again, I go to one of the backpacker hostels and ask if they do left luggage for the general public, the man says they don't but he gets me a map and marks where another hostel and the tourist centre are and tells me to try them. He lets me keep the map.
So off I go, but the tourist centre doesn't open until 11am and it is only 9.30, so I go to the library, join the library, log on to a computer, try to update the blog but the browser is too old to be compatible, and the laptop hub is full of laptop users so I cannot go on the netbook.
Suddenly I am hot and struggling to breathe, I take painkillers and cough mixture and feel a bit better.

I go back to the tourist centre and they turn out to be probably the only left luggage facility in the city, and they are only open from 11am-4pm each day, I gratefully leave my heavy luggage there.

I go and get a parcel of chips and a cup of tea for my lunch, unhealthy but cheap.

Then I go to look for a daycentre that is in the book and apparently open from 1.15-3.30. I hope it is not another wild goose chase.
It takes ages to find, but it is ok, I get many cups of tea, they have a quiet room and a good ethic, they don't do food on a monday but they give us biscuits and fruit and they give me directions to two evening outreaches for food and they find me a blanket and sleeping bag, and I have a shower.
The daycentre can't store luggage but the charity shop staff say they will store it a few days a week (still only short hours) and they will have a think where else I may be able to store it.

I start walking back to collect my luggage, it is now raining.
I worry that I will not get there in time but I get there in plenty of time, then I get a cuppa and I go in the toilets and try to downsize my luggage by parting company with a lot of things into the bins, still heavy but a bit less so.
I find a space on the laptop hub and start charging the netbook and the phone.
I am embarrased because my nose keeps running and needing blowing.It is hard to breath because I am asthmatic with a chest infection and my nasal passages are so small that it is hard to breathe through my nose anyway and so much worse with a cold.
But apart from that I am ok. Tired.
I think tonight I will use my last pound on a |McD's or chip supper and I have enough stickers for a McD's cuppa, and I wont walk all the way to the outreach but will look for a bedding down spot and will bed down as early as I can.

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