Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

Good morning bloggypeeps,
I see you are eagerly waiting for an update :)

Well last nigh when the library closed I went to McD's and sat there with a cuppa as I waited for the nightmare shelter to open.

Then I went to the night shelter, I was welcomed and given curry and rice that helped to clear my head a bit.

The shelter looks similar despite being partially moved due to building work, they are using part of the next door church hall.
The men have their dormitory on the church hall floor, each has a mattress and an army sleeping bag, the staff have their office in the kitchen, and the loos are portaloos outside.

My bed is in a pod, a kind of cupboard, which is separate from the men's dormitory, and there are no showers. Last time I was here I was alone in the women's wing, which was a 3 bed room with a private shower room, very nice, but the pod is ok, I wont mind the enclosedness because I need the sleep and warmth because I am poorly. And I am reminded of 'Hooby-pods' I used to get up early and watch Open University and the hoobs, and I always wanted to sleep in a Hooby-pod like the ones the hoobs slept in, and now I get to sleep in a hooby pod! yay.

I tuck down to sleep at 8.30, I am glad there are no other women as I know I snore and am hot and restless at the moment. The mattress is nice and hard, which helps.
I am snoring before I am even alseep properly.
I sleep solidly and dream vaguely about traffic wardens, I wake at 6.30am, 30 minutes before wake up call.
I am very hot and I need the loo and am uncomfortable, this is how I usually feel when I wake up indoors.

I walk carefully through the lines of sleeping and waking men and go to the portaloo.
The men who are awake say good morning and I am reminded of the polite friendliness of this part of the world after so long in less friendly parts. I had wondered when i came back here if I was just remembering through rose coloured spectacles but no, it is a friendlier and calmer part of the world.

I go back to my pod and try to doze for a bit longer, but the call of the tea is too much and I get up and get my tea and toast just before the wake up call.

The man on duty tells me to come back to the daycentre later for form filling and things.
I say ok but I tell him I am unlikely to be staying around.

I feel generally a bit better, with the infection in my foot and on my nose both a bit less, and my lungs and nose are a bit clearer too.

I go out and wait for the luggage service up the road to open, I have a wash in the toilets, the luggage service is £3 to leave the bag until 11pm this evening.

I walk along and stop to look at the huge rain clouds boiling over on the horizon, beautiful, I stand and daydream, looking at the park and remembering it white with frost and snow years ago, as I stand there dozily, those big rain clouds hurry in and start raining busily on me.
Legend according to housedwellers is that getting wet when you're ill is bad for you, so I go and hide in a phone box and put my day bag on the handy shelf in there while I watch the rain until it eases.

I go to the chemists, the first chemist has my magic medicine for only £3, but none of the other things I need, so I go to a second chemist, they have TCP and I also get some vitamins as my immune system is obviously down, two harsh colds in a month or so is pretty bad, and I know it is not vitamin C and Zinc that I need, more vitamin B and D, which helps with the immune system. I get a multi vitamin and mineral supplement in case anything else is lacking.
The only thing they don't have is Difflam, and I need that as the sore in my mouth is not the wisdom tooth, it is a big apthous ulcer hiding in the gum by the wisdom tooth, also an indicator that I am run down.
So I have to find difflam elsewhere.

I stop to gargle some TCP and put some on the infections, I soak my sock in TCP to help the sore foot, (the other disinfectant doesn't really make any difference, I always swear by TCP and it also tastes better than the disinfectant).

I suddenly go hot and breathless again, what on earth is wrong with me? then I go cold, and weak.
I head for the daycentre.

At the daycentre there are biscuits and chocolate everywhere, plenty of tea, and big piles of egg sandwiches made with tiger bread.

The men are as polite as usual and everyone has lots of space, as is usual in this area and with these people.

A member of staff asks if I can come back later for a chat and paperwork and I say yes, in the meantime I am allowed to sit and read the papers and drink tea, I do have few chocolates and an egg sandwich despite it not being lunch time yet.

Then I head back outside, and suddenly I feel very weak again and hot and cold.
I walk on but I bring the tea and food back up as I walk, I hate people having to see me bring my food up, this is not the actual vomituing which I also do, this is just that the food gets blocked and cannot reach my stomach so it comes back up.
I head for the library and have to run for the toilets again.
I think when I go to the hospital next week I will ask them if they can do a test for H. Pylori and then maybe antibiotics would improve my health a lot if it turns out to be that.

Here I am on the laptop hub, which is normally crowded by territorial people, there is plenty of space but I will have to run for the loo again in a minute.
There is a good set of loos and a respectable cafe just by the library.


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