Tuesday

Good morning peeps,

I am tired and I feel like I was hit by a brick.
I do know what being hit by a brick feels like by the way.

Last night I worked a steady shift, I was supposed to finish early but the other driver had an ill daughter so I stayed on. It was an easy shift apart from the satnav trying to send me through a  barrier, and when I went the other way round there were emergency services blocking the road so I had to park and walk up.
Apart from that it was all good, and when I finished I went shopping, I run low on things at the weekend now as I don't have any work between Saturday morning and Monday evening and I live hand to mouth.

Unfortunately when I got home I found that my landlady had moved her daughter in without warning as her daughter had split up with her partner.
So the daughter was on the sofa telling someone all about it on the computer, quite loudly, late, when I was exhausted and needed bed, and the landlady was also staying.
So I wasn't sure what to do, still am not, I only just got here, what now? Well I still haven't changed my status from homeless anyway, I can't really safely settle after the horrific actions of the police and church.

But anyway, I put earplugs in and fell into bed and slept.

I woke early, 5.45 and drank tea in the dark and went to the beach. It was raining, the sun is shining now but if I go gardening, it will probably rain again.

I am so tired, and my heart is doing the racing and skipping thing, the one my mate in Jersey says is dangerous. It hasn't done much of that since 2013, during the height of the church smear campaign my heart raced a lot, the ECG at St. Georges showed a repeat blip but the painful heart exam that I forget the name of, didn't show anything.
Previous to that I was unexpectedly rushed to hospital with my heart not beating properly, I hadn't known it wasn't beating properly until a first aider told me. The hospital said the ECG was wrong and it was either a heart murmer or a reaction to something, but in true NHS style, nothing got done. No wonder the NHS kill so many people, idiots.

Anyway, never mind all that.

I did get my DLA today, I don't know what they are playing at, but it meant I could order a new heavy machine for my neck, which will be a blessed relief, I am in so much discomfort, the new machine arrives tomorrow and I will beat the hell out of my neck with it. I can't phsyically release the tension from the injuries myself and I absolutely hate physical contact even from myself, haha, I do not like pressing the muscles to release them, the machine does an excellent job, as long as it doesn't break.

Right, I guess I had better make a token effort to work. Hedge trim, winter prune fruit trees, dig aimlessly at some ground, sweep a few leaves.

I have hoovered the whole flat this morning, yesterday I did bins and laundry, everything is clean and tidy, but I don't know what the future is now.