Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Friday, 11 March 2016

Friday morning

Good morning,

Well it is one of those days. My brain is slightly asleep still.

Yesterday I waited in for the parcel and got on with my assignments.
Then I went to wait for the post but it had already come and they had left a slip saying they couldn't deliver my parcel. I was cross.

I went to look for the postmans, because they will let me have parcels if I go after them. It saves me trekking to the sorting office the next day.
So I caught the postmans and they said they had tried to ring the bell for the flat and maybe it wasn't working.
Maybe they are right, I will get someone to test it for me.
But anyway I got my parcel but I was cross and stressed.

So I went out doing deliveries and I got so caught up in that that I finished the week's work.
That surprised the boss, he said 'you work too quick, no? Almost two lots in a week?'
But he was misremembering, because I finished the last lot on Saturday and he told me to come in on Sunday to be paid, and yesterday was Thursday and I started the work early this week and had more time due to quitting the evening delivery work.

So I am all done delivering this week and relieved, so I start gardening today. Just this morning and then it is back to assignment work.
I am also preparing for my next music exam in May, and the sponsored walk which kicks off on Easter Monday.
And looking at next academic year's modules.
You know my learning difficulties mean that the maths side of the BSc Route quite hard? It looks like I will veer onto BA instead, but I am sure you can imagine that isn't so bad :) I think I know which modules I will be doing. All of this years work will count, so I have not lost anything.

Anyway, last night I was tired so I retired to bed with my laptop and the television :)
I watched Hollyoaks and drifted.
But I was listening to that song, one of the cries of my heart for Jersey, and that didn't help, it isn't time to grieve yet, I have to go on living:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwGTbMMo0Io

I couldn't grieve when I was homeless or I wouldn't have survived.

Anyway, I fell asleep early again, and slept soundly, but I dreamed.
I dreamed that someone I know but don't like very much, turned out to be a paedophile, and I witnessed him behaving inappropriately, and I confronted him.
This dream was really strange because instead of the Jersey-and-church-style cover-ups, the outcome surprised me. In the dream someone heard me confronting this man, and called the police and then stood there and told us they had heard what I had said and had called the police.
And the police turned up.
The police actually took things seriously and wanted to question me on what I had seen, imagine if that happened in real life!
Anyway. In the dream I was furious with the police because they have treated me so badly in real life.
So I raged at them for what they have done to me, and they stood there looking surprised.
Poor dream-officers, it wasn't all their fault!

Anyway, I woke up thinking 'What on earth!' Because that was way too vivid and cohesive.
And as far as I know that man isn't a paedophile, he is a pritstick and I don't like him but I can't see him being a paedophile.

Anyway, the day started with dyspraxia.
I woke late, 6.30 and struggled to get going.
I opened the curtains and there was a surprise. Looking down to the sea, there was a big orange sun rising out of thick mist, pretty awesome.

I bumped my head getting into Florence and then I made a mistake on my paper round.
I really am clumsy and unco-ordinated today.

I had better go to work now.




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