This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Monday, 23 January 2012

good morning bloggypeople,
Your bloggywriter is not feeling great, depression is having a field day.

Yesterday afternoon and evening were the usual endurance test that sunday evenings in winter are for a homeless person, only worse.
I wandered about when the library closed, had a rare snooze in the shed where I keep my blankets, woke u pdepressed, wandered down to a church, for some reason there was no evening service and no explanation, so I walked all the uphill back and kept looking for a church I could actually go to but there was nothing and I felt too depressed to face going to the samaritans. I ended up hobbling to McDonalds and sitting in there, writing in my journals.
In the end I left there and went to a cafe nearby that is open on Sundays and has toilets, as I was getting a pot of tea someone approached me, she said she had heard about me from someone else and she recognised me because of my giraffe, she is someone who has a teddy with her at all times like my friend in London used to.
We sat and chatted.
Then the cafe closed and I went off to the 24 hour toilets and by the time I had been there it was soup kitchen time, soup kitchen was nondescript, and then I went home to bed, or rather back to my sleeping place.

I slept and dreamed, I have now forgotten the dreams, though I remembered them earlier, I woke at 5.45am feeling very upset and depressed about the church and wishing with all my heart that I was coherent enough to explain properly to someone and that there was someone to listen who was able to take action.

I got up and went to the market for tea hour, sometimes I wish there weren't so many creepy men at tea hour, but who else would be at the market for breakfast at that hour? Here I am, wound up and depressed.

Today should go like this: Use of the courtesy shower at the church, doctor's appointment, meeting with someone who is willing to let me sleep in their shed, meeting with the charity about my benefits appeal.
And that will take up time that I need to work on the blog, but all those things are necessary.

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