Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Thursday, 27 July 2017

Thursday

Good evening peeps,

Here comes the boom is on Movie Mix, so I am watching that, old favourite.

Yesterday I went to work down the marina when the rain eased a bit. It was still damp and miserable, with the wind howling in the masts.

I felt tired and grotty.

Recently I come home and sit in the dark, so I did that. And I went to bed early.

This morning I crawled unwillingly to work, started on the cliff top, when my old lady got home from the doctor, she made me a cup of tea. There was a hard rain shower and I sheltered in her porch.

Then I went to the mansion, they had gone away and forgotten to tell me or pay me. And they had bolted one of the gates, so I could only do some work. For some reason the flashbacks are terrible when I am there, and they were today, but I woke to flashbacks and they have been bad all day, all week actually.

Then there was another rain shower.

I had Max booked in for testing at the service station at 2pm, so I had time to get lunch and tea up on the cliffs.
The wind was blowing the waves and my favourite cafe didn't mind seeing me in grubby work clothes and boots rather than the day clothes and study books that they usually associate me with. I enjoyed some time on the cliffs before taking the car in.

I like the service station, they greet me by name and offer me coffee. They took Max, which always makes me anxious, and Max seemed sulky. But he was OK, we have ruled one thing out.

After that, I headed for town, I usually order 5HTP online but I am severely depressed and can't wait, so I got some in town. I looked all round the shop and then found it by the counter, got some on special offer as well.
I always leave things, don't realise, until it becomes a problem, running out of 5HTP, needing a new pillow, needing to use an inhaler, I guess I must still dissociate a bit.

I have ordered a new pillow by the way, there is improvement in my sleeping, but I do need to keep my neck supported better as I don't think the worn down pillow is helping my health.

Anyway, I ended my working day at the farm, I mowed the orchards.
Then I fed the animals and put them away.

I came home, did fish and rice, put the washing on, and it is just lazy tv, I feel a bit better, maybe.

The washing is out, and I am gambling on being up early and getting the washing in before it rains tomorrow.

I am working down the marina with the boys in the morning, and I should be working for my old lady in the afternoon but I am likely to be rained off.





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