This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Sunday, 23 July 2017


Good evening peeps,

Shocked. Yes. Struggling to finish my very satisfying and thorough routine of tidying the flat and prepare for the working week.

Anyway, this morning I woke just before 7, after another restless night, I showered and dressed, black jeans, work shirt and boots, and off I went to shepherd my little farm.

I took the pigs by surprise, as I had prepared their food last night and they were still sleepy, I remember the intensive pig farm, where the pigs would start shouting at 5am and you had to have ear muffs.

I let the ducks out so they could get food and water first, then the geese.

There were no eggs this morning, but I fed and watered the hens and quails and opened the greenhouse for some air.

Then, it was time to head into town for church.

I nipped into McD's for coffee, and to change my shirt, reminiscent of the good old days when I was homeless.
My black jeans and work boots, as long as I scraped the boots off, were smart enough for church, but my shirt needed changing.

You know how my church never fails to surprise me and come up with new things? This week was no different. They had me helping with Sunday school this week. It has been many years now since I used to do that.

We had a visiting group with children, so Sunday school needed a hand, so I was that hand.

It was funny sitting there with a load of excited children, who kept scattering all over the place, with me having just come from the farm, I was sure God was laughing, especially as the other Sunday school leader was also a gardener.

It was a nice time, I don't mind what I do, to be honest. And after the service, I was surprised that people made a fuss of me for doing Sunday school, they do fuss me a bit, as you know, and as I am the condemned pariah of the church of england, it never fails to surprise me. You know how it is for me? I don't believe either that I am worthy of kindness or that any kindness or friendship will last, and if you looke at the way the church destroyed me and my friendships and communities for so long, the fears are realistic, especially as the church-police harm continues.

Anyway, there had been a party at church yesterday, I could have gone to it but I wasn't really in party mood, but there was lots of food left over, so guess who got to take a bagful of food home?
It means I have a good lunch for tomorrow.

I came home, and started the cleaning and tidying and preparation for the working week, it was all going so well. I also got the new book/report over 25,000 words.

I popped to the farm this evening to shut up, the weather remained so wet, the geese, instead of being norty, were waiting by their hut, demanding to be shut in.

I got some eggs from the hens, I closed the greenhouse, and heavy rain continued to fall as I came home.

I hoped to continue the cleaning and sorting of the flat as well as some more writing, but then I had an utter shock, that has left me bewildered and struggling.

Someone reporting on my case in the JEP again, after the foul, vile, disgusting way the JEP and Jersey press and media have treated me.

But apparently they were criticizing the bad 'uns, not attacking me, nonetheless, after being destroyed in the press and media, especially the JEP, and knowing that any new article gives the haters a change to attack again, and they will. The level of trauma is such that any new shock like this has a severe effect on me, I was left bewildered, you know how I go? Cold, confused, not sure if I have eaten or drunk or washed or what the time is? Yeah, like that.

I am grateful for the support on twitter. I am trying to pull myself together and finish my chores.


  1. I hope the shock is getting better

    1. Thanks Emma, I think I have had a virus or allergic reaction this week, as well as flashbacks, but I will go on living, as I do.


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