Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Sunday, 23 December 2012

The depression is 72 on the Goldbeg Scale, I am a mess at the moment, I keep bursting into tears, I don't want to lift my head, don't want to say hello to people, I want to curl up in a soft nest and sleep.

Ever since Friday afternoon there have been deeply drunk and silly people around, lots of them.
Friday evening was funny, I listened to a drunk lady telling a man how to cook fish, they had this conversation for more than half an hour, I never knew so much about fish cooking before.
The ferries were noisy yesterday.
Lots of hopelessly drunk people.

But as for me, I haven't just thrown the toys out of my pram, I threw myself out of my pram and then threw the pram out of the pram and no, I am not proud of it like my sister in law is when she goes mad, I am very sad and I don't know what to do.
I was destroyed by church, abuse and cover ups, and when I am like this I don't want my church and my friends, I want them to go far away because I am hurting so much.

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