This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Friday, 15 January 2016


Good evening,

Well I am sitting in bed, all cozy and tired.

last night I slept well but I dreamed of the Channel Islands, where I am not at the moment.
The dream was vivid and a bit sad, but I woke up relaxed and peaceful.

I got up, earlier than usual, because today I got some money, and with no petrol in Florence and only 70p in the electric meter and a lot of other things needing doing, I thought I would get started.

Florence was frozen in the frost, and when I started her and ran the engine I remembered there wasn't much petrol, so I just sprayed her with de-icer and we bowled down to the garage and fed her.
Then I went straight from there to do the papers, local paper day only meant 8 extra papers, nothing as major as on the old rounds.

After the papers, I went to drop some paperwork off at the local authorities, a necessary weevil, but seeing as the gym is up that way, I had a gym session.
I didn't get told off for doing a hundred reps, I got told off for doing my reps too fast.
I have this habit of if I am distressed or thinking about other things, I speed up, and in the gym, that is not always a good thing, depending on what I am doing.

Anyway, so I came home via the shop for teabags and other things, and the laundry for my washing.
At home I had my shower, transformed into clean clothes, and headed off for my day out.

Well it was a lovely day.

I was worried that my Mum was asleep as she didn't answer when I was heading over, but she is daft about her phone.
Eventually she answered, so all was well.

Oh we did have a good time, lots of coffee and talk, just what I really needed.
My parents have just had the joy of teaching their adoptive daughter a new life skill as well :)

I don't call him Dad, as you know, because that is a word that hurts me, but he is my adoptive Mum's husband and I can't name him on here, but anyway, he is a suduko buff, and so for some reason I am of an age to learn suduko. So he was teaching me, and because he and Mum play suduko differently, they were bickering happily over it, and a lot of other things. They are funny.
I kind of got the hang of suduko, and again, this shows the shift in my brain that can override the learning difficulties that used to hold me back.

But the thing is, that time, just learning suduko and listening to my parents and assuring them that I will never get married, was the sweetest and loveliest time, and I will treausre it.
The Church of England taught me that all that matters is money, status and overachievement and boasting. 
My parents taught me that what matters is kindness and forgiveness and love.
And believe me, they and I are testimony, they have been my parents for five years now and they met me when I was absolutely destroyed, and I am where I am now because of their love and example.
I am not perfect but no-one is, but I am blessed.

Anyway, once my time with my parents was over, I headed to the library for study. My local libraries are pretty scabby, so I like to go to the big libraries when I can, and study hard.

Today has been freezing, and I came home to a cold home as I left the windows open. Well the thing is, it has rained and galed for so long and the flat does need airing whenever it is safe to leave the windows open, so I expected a cold house, and it has warmed up well now, but I left some lights on all day and that was unusually careless for me.

It is now my bed time.
And I think I will sleep.

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