Hey peeps,
I am having trouble typing, I am tired and my head and neck ache, I couldn't get my neck to respond to the machine yesterday, I seem to have pulled a muscle but now it is the usual neck spasm.
Yesterday I did the mowing.
Then I came back home for a while.
Then I went to do the farm. It was all cold and frozen up there and I was glad of my jumper.
Then I went to try this new delivery driving job.
The guy who had offered me the job wasn't there, and the other people didn't know he had hired me, so that wasn't a good start, no-one explained anything, except the other driver, who told me that we weren't just working for one takeaway but three.
I was nervous, I didn't really feel up to it, the years of harm by the church and police have worn me down and I am not really fit for work, especially not pressurized work.
And with multiple places to pick deliveries up from, it was pressurized.
I worked all evening, and it was stressful, they kept putting the wrong addresses on the takeaways.
And I didn't know the system for sorting the money out, and no-one knew that nothing had been explained, but it got done.
They didn't say anything about me coming back, neither did I, whoever hired me hadn't told them anything.
I was very tired and dying for the loo as I hadn't stopped all evening, and Max had got so low on petrol that I was worried, I think the man at the petrol station was worried at how I looked because he made jokes to cheer me up.
I came home and slept a restless and stressful night and got up late because I have no work until the farm this evening, and after that I am helping set up for something.
I will go to the welfare for coffee and to pick up some food.
Someone got me the Jacqui Lawson advent calender, but I don't really want it any more, it is all a pretence, it used to be special.
I wanted the alpine one but I have the sea one and it is the same as last year, and the sea isn't beautiful for me any more.
A survivor of Church abuse and cover ups goes on battling for her voice to be heard. A daily account of life after the Diocese of Winchester destroyed her and the slow and painful steps to rebuilding a life.
Introduction
This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/
The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.
The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.
Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP
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