This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Thursday, 10 April 2014

Thursday Evening

Good evening,
Please excuse the lack of blog, I have been very tired and a lot has been happening, normally I warn you before I take a break.

I have made notes, so I will start from Tuesday.

I had lunch at the drop in and went on the computers, did chili and rice for tea as that is what I got from Amazon.
I was tired, I had a bus ride and then watched Forrest Gump as I settled to sleep, I am the female UK version of Forrest Gump, although not always as succesful.

I slept lightly and woke a lot.
I never heard the rows that took place that night, thankfully, with my earplugs in I was oblivious.

A bit more water came through the ceiling and the lights remained out as well, it has been a very long time since the lights worked.

When I got up yesterday, I decided to wait for the post as I was waiting for various letters and the last bit of my Amazon order - enough UHT milk to keep me through the thin times, including yesterday.

Nothing turned up with the post.

I was so tired that my walk to the drop-in was an ordeal, but worth it.

At the drop-in I was supplied with tea, hot toast and bacon sandwiches :)
We all had a good natter and they were nagging me to come bowling next week, so I will.
I needed to check with the clinic what I can and cannot do.
I have remembered my neck exercises every day, and my painkiller consumption was never high but I am barely on any at all now, and I have not had much spasm in my neck at all :)

Anyway, after a good chat and a discussion about furniture for me from the charity and how I can get my concessionary bus pass, I staggered home with the leftover milk :)

Now it was time for housework, so I put a towel and linen wash on.

But when I went to put the rubbish out, I had a shock, the first of two shocks yesterday.

The packaging from the UHT milk was discarded in the rubbish area and my UHT milk order had been stolen, by another resident.

I was shocked, theft is really upsetting, because of the though that someone could do that to you.
Someone who lives in the same place as you.

Fortunately my lesser spotted landlord was hiding behind his van, so I caught him before he could do a runner. (only joking )
My landlord was not a happy man.

He couldn't do much about the parcel being pinched but some of his post that comes direct to our place had also been stolen, and he intends to install a security camera, which I approved because the antisocial behaviour is so bad sometimes, he asked if I had heard the rows the previous night, I said no, and he said he had given some of the antisocials a weeks notice at half-past midnight because of what had been going on then -which I slept through, haha.

But, gathering by the rows about drugs money in the house recently, I would wager that the missing post and parcel etc are being taken for drugs money.

Anyway, I hung the towels and linens out in the sunshine and breeze to dry, a heavy load, so they took their time, and I had a clothes wash on as well, so I had to work hard to make sure everything dried and didn't make the place damp, because heating and ventilation have gone to pot. I used the kettle and hot water bottle to help dry things, nonetheless, I got a chest infection, possibly from the damp, although all clothes, towels and linens dried.

I did chili and rice for tea, and other residents said it smelled nice, they were having some kind of indignation meeting about what has been going on in the place, gings on I have mainly missed out on, no-one is happy, and I had to keep stepping over them all as I sorted my washing out :(

The housework all got done, spotless, and I did my task lists and shopping lists as I watched the music channel, I used to watch the music channel and I am back in that habit.

So I made the bed with fresh linens and watched Crocodile Dundee 2, everything neat and tidy and the supper things washed. I had a nice shower and put my clean pyjamas on.

I was happy to be all in order, so I texted my friend to see if we could meet up in the next few days.

The second shock of the day occured.

My friend was taken ill on Monday and had been rushed to hospital and had been kept in overnight.

She is home now but under constant watch from her husband, who himself was not too well recently, hence me missing my usual weekend with them.

My friend has an illness, but what has happened is not entirely typical and is very worrying, she says she feels a bit better today, but I am worried sick, she is waiting test results.
She is very dear to me and one person in the world who I can say I love and trust.
I am worried.

Anyway, it was harder to get to sleep last night and I didn't sleep well.

I was up at 5.30am, and went to check if one lot of money was in, it was, the other lot isn't.

So I waited impatiently for a shop to open so I could get milk, orange juice, loo rolls, bread, margerine, etc and then I went and dropped a card at the drop in with my meal money as I wont be there today.
Then I went to the other shop and got orange squash and bleach and washing up liquid, not for mixing, mind you :)

Then I watched the music channel, showered, did this and that until it was time to go to the clinic for therapy.

This is the spine and pelvis and shoulder, and everything else therapy, and it was very painful.
I hate it really but the fact is, it is giving me back mobility and control of my body that I thought was lost forever.
He  was pleased with my neck and skull, there is progress, that was the easy bit, the shoulder, pelvis and legs were the painful bit, and he said that if he did as much as he really wanted to on them then I would roll off the couch and bite his leg, which is probably true, because I felt like biting something at one point, he said, accurately, that my right leg is weaker than my left, yes, hence the left leg going at the knee from the strain, he gave me exercises for the right leg, and he tried to put the left kneecap back in, I have a feeling that will need an operation eventually though.

I was given new sets of exercises for upper spine, lower spine and right leg :( blah.
We also discussed what I can and cannot do now, and he said the important thing now is that I do not do anything for more than 10 or 20 minutes without a total break.

So I staggered merrily homewards to wait for the post, someone else was waiting for the post, so I have a feeling that others are experiencing problems.
I could not wait long as I had a train to catch, so I set off and sent my landlord a message asking if he could look after my post while I was away, as I am enjoying a day out and doing a spot of photography.

Every photograph I take seems like a step towards restoring what the church of england ripped from me.
Those who don't know, photography was one of my hobbies.

Anyway, I feel like I have been run over by a bus, so I will head home fairly soon.


  1. Sorry about your post and lights, but I'm glad the therapy helps even though it's painful and about your photography.

  2. Thank you Emma, it is just a tough time at the moment.

  3. Sorry to hear about the stolen stuff and the pain. Good to hear about the photography.

  4. Thanks Tony, well the stolen parcel is to be replaced, as long as it isn't stolen again! And I will be ok in a day or two, and I am loving being able to do photography again :)