Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Friday 28 September 2012

Hi Bloggypeeps,
It has been a bit of a day.

I was tired last night and sank into sleep, I slept in a bed, which always puts me at risk of pain in my injuries, but I slept well and woke up with no pain.

There were flashbacks and distresses but I blanked those out as best I could.
I woke up not as early as I had hoped to, but with enough time to spare.
I had a shower, the shower floor is still dangerous. And I tidied my legs and feet up because I was going to the walking clinic in the afternoon.
I also sorted out my backpack a bit more. It is still too heavy really.
I had lots of tea but didn't get as far as breakfast, I went to the kitchen and the old chap came in and smiled and said good morning. He knows that I treat the place with respect and never complain.

Then off I went into town.
My pal with the dog was having a bad morning and had only sold one Big Issue. So he didn't want to talk.
I went to get a locker, the security guards know me so they picked up the locker book as soon as I walked in. So my stuff is in the locker until this evening.

I went on the computer briefly. Then I went to one of the churches, they greeted me, welcomed me back and asked the usual questions about my travels and made me several coffees. Then I went up to the daycentre and had a natter and two cups of tea, they asked where my pal is and if he is ok, I told them he is out there selling the Issue and is just having a bad patch.

Then I walked up to My church, my friend's boyfriend usually church-sits on a Friday, and he is there today, filling in a form as he waits for people to come into the church, he makes me a tea and I light a candle, he tells me about an interesting course that he is doing in London, and it reminds me of my Mum.
Then I wander off again, eventually it is time for the outreach lunch.

The outreach lunch is an interesting phenomenon, it is at yet another church.
There are three tables at the lunch and the one in the corner is usually where the rogues sit, the one in the middle is where older people often sit, and the one I am on is where the unusual people sit. It is not strictly this way, it just seems to work like this.

I sit down and my pal passes me the bread and butter, it used to be that I had so much trouble gettinjg anything passed to me that I used to get a bit cross, but my pal seems to have taken on the job of passing things, so I get bread and butter, and the volunteers all come and ask how I have been and welcome me back, then they bring me some soup, which is the important thing.
We have bread and soup, then some fruit and cake and tea.
it is a nice simple lunch and the volunteers are lovely.

I walk up and go to the gallery. My friend isn't there but her assistant is, he is feeling very low and gloomy.
I sit and talk to him but he is really down.
So I wander off and check with the dentist to see if I need a checkup, I think my dentist may kill me when she hears that I have lost my mouthguard again. I am supposed to wear it at night to stop me grinding my teeth in my sleep.
I am due an appointment and they make it for when I have to come back this way for my hospital appointment, but afterwards I realise I will have to re-book it as I wont be able to make it.

I go back to the gallery and my friend is there, I ask her what kind of party it is tonight, 'a party kind of party' she replies.
I ask her if I am supposed to dress up, and she says no, no one will, it is her Birthday and her friend's birthday and it is a joint party, lovely.
She says I can bring my laptop and stay all evening in the warm and do my internet, oh well, it can't be a very lively party in that case!

I go off and buy my thermal leggings from Primark ready for the cold nights in the porch.
My old bedding stash is still where I left it, I wonder if any of it is any good still.

I go to the bus stop to head for my appointment. Sadly I never got there. I had forgotten how awful this bus service is, the useless bus company have a monopoly here. I have allowed lots of time but I wait half an hour and by the time the bus arrives at the stop there is such a large crowd that I have to wait for the next one.
The bus crawls through the traffic, really slow, and I look at the clock and I am already late, I would have a brief walk from the bus anyway and so I decide to walk the rest of the way, sadly I simply couldn't walk it, took the wrong turning anyway and after a long walk my legs are too painful and I am too late for the appointment.
It has been so long since I had walking help that I no longer have the phone number of the clinic on my phone.
so I miss the appointment.
I am not happy.

I get back to town and the library is half-closed due to technical work, so I get a chip butty and sit here on my laptop.
I am going to this 'party' in an hour, it starts at 7.30 not 7.

The weather here is cloudy and there has been light rain, but it is due to stay dry tonight.




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