Good evening peeps,
Things have been really bad.
I have a really severe chest infection, which has now gone to a temperature, and a cool shower hasn't helped.
I would have earned the money for my spinal treatment by now but on Monday I was sick, and by the time I was feeling better, when the care home emailed to say they had the bedding plants, I thought that would be a good job to do, but the compost hadn't arrived.
Then yesterday morning I went to go to work and Max wouldn't start, worse still, I had rolled him back to move out, and I was blocking the garage.
The car's best friend arrived a few hours later, I had tried to write some articles in the meantime, we jump started Max, but his battery was old and knackered, so we went to the industrial estate and changed it.
That took all my reserve money, so it was looking impossible to raise the money for the spinal treatment, which was booked for tomorrow, along with my transport and fares.
By the time Max was running, it was 1pm, and the morning's work was lost.
The care home had the compost, so I went and did that, but I felt exhausted and useless, hundreds of bedding plants later, I came home with enough time to shower and go back out to see my friends, they are so busy that we have trouble finding time to meet up, and I was so tired I nearly cancelled.
We had a very nice evening though and it was good to see them. They know my landlord and they know he wants my room back so he can run a bed and breakfast, so they and all my friends are looking for somewhere for me.
Last night I coughed all night, really bad, little sleep. The chest infection came from not being able to get away from allergens on the train and around public places and transport in Wales, but it has become a really bad one and now my temperature is up as well.
Today was just as much a disaster. I can no longer even do a morning's heavy work, my back has simply given in and said it won't hold, so I am dividing all my work into two hour slots, which is annoying but I can't work otherwise, so I went and did two hours for my lady on the cliffs, but she was having a bad day, worried sick over a scan for returning cancer, she went for her scan, and I battled trauma and flashbacks as I worked alone.
Then the DWP contacted me to say that they had totally trashed my PIP claim and were removing my DLA.
As I am sure you can imagine, this means no psychological therapy, and worse beyond imagining, I cannot continue and complete the spinal treatment, and my spine will degenerate until I am incapacitated, and there is nothing I can do. Even if the NHS hadn't destroyed me and thrown me away in conjunction with the church and police, they do not offer the treatments that would save my spine, their usual line is to feed dangerously strong drugs to people, and I react to those, so saying that I should go to the NHS now would not be appropriate, I work for people who have been left with this pain and degeneration and the NHS are just pumping drugs into them.
So, I have lost my battle to save my spine and my career, I have lost the delivery driving work, I am losing my home, Max has been hit by the neighbour's car and has also broken down, and now his gear stick has broken, I have a raging chest infection and a temperature, and tomorrow I have tickets and fares pre-booked to a spinal treatment that I have no money for and have had to cancel, for good.
Anyone for some rhubarb trifle?
It's really not funny.
A survivor of Church abuse and cover ups goes on battling for her voice to be heard. A daily account of life after the Diocese of Winchester destroyed her and the slow and painful steps to rebuilding a life.
Introduction
This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/
The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.
The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.
Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP
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