Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Saturday, 3 June 2017

Saturday

Good evening peeps,

I am tired.

Yesterday I went back to work on the estate, I worked hard and it was hot.
I had half an hour left to cut some hedges when the site manager turned up and told me about an area that the boss had overlooked, there were complaints about it, so I shot over there and picked up speed and cleared it, this put my body under too much stress. And I was left with only 10 minutes to do a bit of the hedges.

I left two very heavy ton bags for the boss, which would send him mental as he has the flatbed van. Heehee.

Then I went into town and had lunch, and then went to do the old lady's garden, she wanted me to spend half an hour on tea and biscuits but I politely refused. The The wind picked up and thunderclouds gathered, but just a few spots of rain fell as I finished work.

I got home so tired that I couldn't do anything. This heat and breathing difficulties and very hard work are exhausting me, and on top of that, the misery of the church of england destroying me never lessens.

I went to bed at 8.30, fast asleep. I woke at 1.30am with nightmares and lay awake suffering distress before drifting back into nightmares.

I woke at 7am and got up, but couldn't occupy myself, idly computering and cleaning the kitchen as well.
After a while I went out, I had garden centre stuff to get, and letters to post, shopping to do. Errands, a boring Saturday morning, and then I had to work this afternoon. At least I got the washing done and out to dry.

The care home keeps getting left until last as my week is so heavy. So today I spent three hours there, and time did fly, there was a breeze and some shade and time went by. I got significant work done there, which is good, but I came home tired and not wanting to do anything, again.

I am having a three week break from church, for three different reasons and none of them are to do with my church or churchpeople, this week I am tired and simply need to rest tomorrow before another hard week, next week there is an event in town which will make parking hard and I would like to stay at home, and the third week I am away.
I may meet up with some of the peeps in the meantime.
I am afraid of not going to church, because I am so isolated and the trauma of the church of england overwhelms me, but on the other hand I am not dependent on church.

Today has been sunny but slightly cooler than the sweltering week, and with a breeze.

There is nothing decent on TV at all.


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