This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Tuesday evening

Good evening,

Well yesterday the weather got brighter so I went out on my bike, but the ground was too wet for gardening.
Last night I went to bed early but had to knock myself out with high dose 5HTP.
I only had vague terrors and woke this morning not really wanting to get up, thankfully the newsround means I have to get up.
It was a bright morning but with strong winds, rain was blowing from clouds far away, but I got the round done before it got too bad.
My work today was cancelled due to the site being under renovation and at a point where I couldn't work round the renovators.

Bob Hill did another blog all of a sudden.

For once it helped me by releasing some of the severe tension I have been carrying for so long.

I have been busy with paperwork for various things that I am not telling you yet.

I feel tired, I can't get the medicines I need because I am not on ESA any more so I don't get free prescriptions until I get tax credits, so at the moment I have no tablets or inhalers and so my peak flow is pretty bad, I can't afford my meds, I am still on a low income. It will get better in the next few weeks though.

I have been out on my bike, the waves on the bay are big and clean., real surfer's waves, however, I am not fit to surf or do any watersports this year :(

The cat has been busy, he was sleeping out in the garage a lot, he has always had a nest there but went through a phase of sleeping there a lot.
But right now he is in a purring heap in my armchair, he had always ignored my armchair until the other day and I found him sitting there, looking very unsure of what my reaction would be, so I put his blanket on the armchair and he is very happy.
He was still also sleeping in the garage but this morning I went in there, expecting him to be there, but a tent or a folding chair was lying across his nest, I had a horrible feeling it fell on him, and I couldn't find him, but when I did, I checked he was OK and showed him I had moved the horrible object that fell on his peaceful snoozery. Poor cat! I love my cat, he is a great comfort to me.
This afternoon I was so tired I tried to have a sleep, but the cat came and sat on me and washed itself, it is so difficult to sleep when a cat is sitting on you and washing itself.

I am just watching my programmes, then I will do the hoovering and mopping and put the bins out, the local bylaw is bins go out after 7pm, or something.

I am having a much needed break from music today. I get very tense about music and my tutor says I don't need to, I should have time off sometimes.

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