This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more:

Saturday, 2 August 2014

Saturday Evening

Well it has been a funny old day.

Last night repeated efforts to go to sleep failed, so I stayed up all night, it is funny, it is always weekend nights, usually Fridays, that sleep is impossible, and I would say that it could be because of drunk people making a noise, but I do not always hear them as I try to sleep.

Anyway, so I was up all night, but it wasn't a wasted night, I got a lot done.
I will possibly post a list of things I did at the end of this post.

When I went out my door early this morning, the neighbour had put a note on my door, it said that she is baking and will leave a parcel of goodies, and did I want to borrow any DVDs? :)

Dawn started sometime between 5 and 6 and I walked down to the bay to watch the dawn, the sky was grey and cloudy and the breeze was cold and strong, refreshing, it was nice to watch the lights against the grey sky, but it was an ever so funny time.
Firstly there was a couple sprawled on the beach, fully clothed and chaste, watching the waves, dozing? But when they saw me, they scrambled up as if embarassed, and went away, I was puzzled. Maybe they had had a night of drinking and were a bit disorientated.
Then another funny thing was a whole family, man, lady and little children, all sleeping in a car.
Now we don't get car sleepers down here, and this was a family, and, I know how cold sleeping in a car can be, even in summer, and they didn't have the engine on, but they were all fast asleep, even the little baby.
Then there was a man feeding ducks on the reserve, but huge crowds of seagulls descended. This was just after 5am.
I think my little town is full of nutters, no wonder I get on so well here! :)

By 7am, I went down to the local shop to get the paper and some peanut butter for my toast.
Usually the shop does cashback, and I needed cash to get a weeks bus pass, but for some reason they would not do cashback this morning. So, a bit miffed as I wasn't walking well, I hobbled to the other shop, and it was the same, but on the high street, the lovely lady in the supermarket there let me get cashback, so I got my favourite shower gel, their own brand, £1 a big bottle, and got cashback and went and got the bus up to the big supermarket to do a proper shop!
The problem was, I had had a sudden alergic reaction in the local shop, it is usually someone's perfume or aftershave first thing in the morning, my lungs go haywire, so I was a bit coughy and wheezy.

I did the big, shop, and as usual forgot something, this time it was the decaf teabags, which are vital as I need tea to comfort me right up to bed time but the caffiene could affect my already disrupted sleep if I am not on decaf in the evening.

Anyway, I got home, put the shopping away, sorted the new flowers out, put the washing on, and went back to bed. It was raining heavily by then.
I slept from 10am to 1am, interestingly I sleep for 3 hours after a night without sleep, every time.
I dreamed a dream of war, I was on a clifftop and the savage army attacking were Christians, although they looked like African Warriors.
One came to me, and he was an African Warrior but he was also Ian LeMarquand, waving a gun, saying he would kill me and that I was to blame and had done wrong.
I laughed at him, told him I was not afraid and that his warriors were despicable, I hit the gun from his hand and pushed him over the cliff.
I remember the grotesque face with warrior paint, surprised and angry, and then he was gone, and I woke, and I woke thinking 'Wow!'.

Anyway, 1pm, I managed to pull myself out of the usual stupor and sickness quite quickly, I had a card to write and a  letter to print to go with it, so I did that, walked to the post office, I was planning on booking a haircut but I realised, I am ok with my hair for now.

Anyway, as I walked, I saw outside the second hand shop, a bike, a blue raleigh ladies bike, and as you know, I was unable to collect a bike I had been offered recently, so anyway, I went in and spoke to the people about the bike, it needs the tyres pumped or some punctures repaired, or possibly the tubes replaced, it also needed oiling and the back brake needs adjusting, but it is a good solid bike, simply neglected, so I bought it.
Wow, big step.
I walked home with this bike, I also got a puncture kit and pump but it has been a long time since I repaired punctures.
We have a bike store a few minutes walk away and they do cheap repairs and maintenance, so they will hopefully do the brake, and the tyres if I fail, and I need a lock, and then I will hopefully learn to ride a bike and adjust my injuries to it and see my muscles continue to regenerate as they are doing through swimming.

So, I oiled everything on this bike, which had been put for sale as it was sitting unused, nothing really wrong with it, and it is sitting by it's new home, waiting for me to get energy to do some more work on it.

I got the washing hung out apart from the beach clothes, which I put on wet, and went for a rather brief and risky swim as huge rough waves are pounding the shore, it is a bay of kite and wind surfers today.
I just wanted to get my spine and limbs to move and stretch as they will in the water but not on land.
At least despite the breeze, the sun is warm but not hot, this weather is much more pleasent to me.

So, home and considering my bath. Also trying to work on important letters and reports, not to do with my own case but someone else's.

This is some of what I did during the night while I couldn't sleep:

  • Discussed the plight of someone who's been deprived of their human rights
  • Discussed how to petition and who would support and be a lead name for the petition
  • Started preparing the petition,
  • collected articles relating to the petition
  • Contacted authors of articles
  • Contacted Amnesty
  • wrote a shopping list
  • looked for things needed for my case
  • made tea
  • worked through a number of emails and replies
  • tried to talk on skype with someone important but skype was acting up
  • Ordered materials I needed when my money came through at 2am
  • Worked on my new CV and printed it
  • dealt with the printer throwing a tantrum
  • Did some background employment work and created a file
  • Sorted out and tidied paperwork to do with my case
  • wrote a lengthy and important letter
  • more emails
  • Attempted my photo project but struggled because of a programme not working
  • Achieved my photo project
  • Washed up and put away
  • Did the daily blog and petition promotions
  • Did a brief research
  • Went for my walk

All in all a productive night and here I am awake and feeling ok and having achieved enough today, a three hour sleep was just fine.

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