Good morning peeps.

Well yesterday I went to the town where I have therapy.
I looked at the sea but it was too hot to be out in the full sun so I didn't go in the sea.
I was tired.

I went for therapy, it was not my best therapy session, I also had to do a trauma questionnaire, it looks bleak, even though I am miles better than I was a year or 18 months ago.

I had no trouble coming back on the rush hour train and managed to get a direct train and a seat all the way.

I was so tired that I lay down and tried to sleep, but someone blundered into my sleeping area and then blundered away again without harming me, and didn't come back, but that left me tense.

I didn't sleep deeply, I was tense and with this tiredness that feels different from normal tiredness.
Then it started raining at 3am and the other homeless were running riot so there was nowhere for me to shelter, and even packing my blankets away was disrupted by the other homeless.
They are a pain.

So I packed the blankets away and climbed down into the drain and lit my stove there, which I shouldn't, and sat on my coat and brewed tea. Drank tea, sat and let time pass, waited till 5am and went walking in the rain, the police slowed to look at me but 5am is a legitimate time to be out and about, I do not wander at night for the very reason that the police can get in a flap about it.

When McD's opened at 6am I got a bagel and orange juice and sat a while, then I went back to my stove, coat and book despite the rain.
I am going to be dead with exhaustion and I am not going to London, probably, because it will be too much for me and I have got my heart appointment in a week and that is another long journey.

Sitting in the cafe with more tea, it is pouring with rain outside.