I keep sitting here, I haven't done anything today except get upset, I need to fill in the gap in the blog that was this summer and then add more emails and details in the hope that you will understand why I got broken.

I am sitting here and I can't do anything. I am tired from last night I think, and I am upset, I have no Christmas and no future.

I am so utterly condemned that there is no future and the more people try to tell me there is, the more I wish I could explain, wish I could explain what the church's action's have done to me in my autistic struggle to work and live and look after myself.
It is a day when it feels as if no one will ever know or understand.