Saturday Night

Good evening,

Well I have had the usual difficulty in relaxing at all.

I put my bed linen on a long hot wash and I was going to go out and bike along the bay before going to swim and gym.

But I biked along the bay, and then I ended up eating and ice cream., and reading the papers in the library, and then getting a load of books, and then getting some groceries.
So I had to go home with my books and groceries, and it was so tempting not to go out again.
But if I didn't then I never would.

So I went out, had a swim, really felt the loss of condition from not going for so long, then I did a circuit of the gym.

I came home and hung the washing out.
Then I have mainly been doing paperwork, and writing letters, and a bit of television, nothing interesting, a bit of housework.
Basically I was just compulsively getting stuff done, I have been severely anxious and with ongoing flashbacks for the past few weeks, still with the church of england's death sentence hanging over me, which is intolerable.

I forgot my music and it is too late for piano practice today, don't want to keep everyone awake, and with two weeks to go, I need to get my revision done but none got done. But with tomorrow's housework all done and a lot of other tasks done, I will get music done tomorrow.

I must put clean linen on the bed now. I am too tired to be awake.