Sunday morning

Good morning,

Well last night I re-arranged my bedding, and I had put the princess blanket in the wash in case it is causing an allergic reaction.
To my surprise, I slept through the night without waking.
I did dream though, and before I woke, I was dreaming sadly that I was back at the old house, the one that was condemned, I dreamed I was there and the other tenants were there but I knew we were not supposed to be there.
I also dreamed I was abroad, mountain climbing, which was nice.

Then I woke, and I felt tired and I wasn't breathing well, so I had to do the dreadful saline, which makes me sick.
I got up and did tea, and showered, dressed, made the bed.

Then I decided not to go to church as I was tired. I biked down to the bay, but it was so windy it made my ears ache and I got too tired, so I came home and have been reading, and writing, and the cat has nicked my orthapedic pillow and gone to sleep on it, haha, rude cat.

I still want to go to the gym, believe it or not. But I do not want to go to the welfare or anywhere. I may go to church this evening.

I am in a way, who I was in Jersey and before, and in a way I am not that person. I am obsessively clean and tidy since I left the streets, and I think in a slightly different way, I tell the Church of England how disgusting they are without swearing. I am not out of my mind like I was, and yet I am under huge stress from the Church of England still, just as I was before. I am not dependent as I was with Juliet and George and Jill, and thus I do not get into the same difficulties of people taking me over and then blaming me when their miracle cures of me do not work. In fact I am fiercely independent. And my relationship with my adoptive mum is totally different from my relationships with old church people who took me over.

I suppose some good came out of the bad, but the price to pay was too much, I would have been better learning how to relate to people and look after myself through good therapy. Which still isn't available, as there is nothing on the NHS and I am still well below the poverty line with the benefits I have to live on.

It is a cold and windy, wet day, possible snow is forecast.