The depression is 72 on the Goldbeg Scale, I am a mess at the moment, I keep bursting into tears, I don't want to lift my head, don't want to say hello to people, I want to curl up in a soft nest and sleep.

Ever since Friday afternoon there have been deeply drunk and silly people around, lots of them.
Friday evening was funny, I listened to a drunk lady telling a man how to cook fish, they had this conversation for more than half an hour, I never knew so much about fish cooking before.
The ferries were noisy yesterday.
Lots of hopelessly drunk people.

But as for me, I haven't just thrown the toys out of my pram, I threw myself out of my pram and then threw the pram out of the pram and no, I am not proud of it like my sister in law is when she goes mad, I am very sad and I don't know what to do.
I was destroyed by church, abuse and cover ups, and when I am like this I don't want my church and my friends, I want them to go far away because I am hurting so much.