I need a break from blogging about the past for an hour or two, I think that blogging about the past, being on all those horrible drugs, last night's adventures and today are all too much emotion, today the lady at the market was asking about my parents and background, I didn't say much. Then at the daycentre a man who works there was saying he had gathered that I had been abused and he had been abused too, so if I wanted to talk about it then he would listen. hm, nice of him. Then going to the church where I stashed my bedding to ask if i could leave it there temporarily after I left my hedge, they had fished it all out of the bush and someone had been going to throw it away but someone else who knew me said they thought it was mine, so they saved it for me and when I got there they rebagged it all for me :) and we put it back in the bush. Now all I need is a decent sleeping place.

argh, everything is exhausting and shocking, last night wasn't good for me.

so I will write about christmases in a minute.

oy santa, send me a fast car and a chalet in the south of France.